Friday, December 18, 2020

She Lay in Repose

He woke, not at first light or before as had been the custom of weeks, but after mid morning, the light of day blocked by curtains heavy and hanging. Reached to the bench, gathered things, unsure by feel of what they were with his fingers now numbing again, apart from the warmth of Her Fire. Passed through the door, to the kitchen, took the loaf of Seed and cut, twice, looked for the butter. And found naught. 

So he anointed with oil, placed the slices both, face to face, raising the couple with his two hands high, above his head and invoked 

Of this, Her body, i do gratefully partake. 

Then he walked farther, out the door, into the fog filtered morning, through the fields, down the path worn by Others, foxes and boars and goats, and to the waters, Her holy Waters, and across, to Her Grove, where She lay in repose, the incarnation Quercus.


She Lay in Repose, the Incarnation Quercus

All very nice, but... this shit has to stop.

Where's the fucking recipe???   --->






The names of good people have been changed to protect their privacy. For some bad ones, I've changed the names when I am no longer as angry with them as I once was, or if I do not wish to embarrass them or those close to them or descended from them. Or, if I think that some fool might try to sue me, maim me, or even kill me!

I'm a writer, not a Warrior, for all my dabbling in the Arts. 

Sometimes, the names of Evil remain unchanged, as I have no fear to speak ill of the dead, especially if they are well buried. Or of some living, who hide in the shadows still and are dead to me. The dead cannot sue, they can but haunt me in my dreams, and the worst of them do that already. May I haunt them back. 


To bake a bread...

Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away.

     – Matthew 5:42 (KJV)

 

She entered Senhor João’s garden and dropped the bucket full of acorns on the ground behind him, causing him to jump at the unexpected noise. He turned and said boa tarde, good afternoon.

“Will you teach me to make acorn bread?” she asked eagerly.

“No!” he replied sharply.

Shock. But… why? “Please!” she pleased, eyes filling wet.

He looked long at her, and it came, the rain, let it fall as it did from her and on her, on him, as it falls on us all. He saw the gentle rain, washing him, stripping slowly the mask of his reluctance, leaving the naked skin of his nakedly apprehensive face.

Well… I don’t know, he came again, the waters washing him with pure intent. I’m not supposed to.

What? said she, surprised. But you said, you told me, all the things, delicious to make from these…

… seeds of life he whispered quietly…

and you refuse but why not fair the cupboards bare and my mother oh so fears

… as do we all in these times, softly…

won’t you show me the way, I need the truth, light the fire and let us bake the bread and break the bread, oh please old father my father she screamed in flash and bang and blood in the night and flight so far away away away in a land far far from home

… and the rain fell, down on him, a torrent, crushing and carrying him in the flood across the dry lands of death, the waters deep in death the depth of suffering and silence of lambs where there should be laughter, be play in the free meadows of light…

and says who forbids your mother that’s rich the cakes the cookies the braided breads of holidays high on the altar of Light now dark and fading, despairing

… he watched her silently.

After a while, she sneezed. Not a pleasant thing in a mask, really. Softly, sobbing: “I’m sorry. I thought… well… my mother has no work, and…”

… still he said nothing. She picked up her bucket to leave. As she turned, he said, “Wait. There’s a way.”

What? a little spark, hope, struck her heart and rose, singing her throat a little as she struggled to form the words in her still rudimentary Portuguese. Como?

“Well,” he said quietly. “I could induct you into the guild.”

Guild? What’s that?

It can be a lot of things, he told her, depending on the context. In my garden, it is a community of complementary plants around a principal tree. That’s part of permaculture’s teaching. But in this case, the society.

Society? Of what? her small voice a puzzle of crystalline fracture.

The secret society. Of alchemists.



An interlude, the author wakes after a night of trampling mares
and a dawn, gentle and loving --->






The names of good people have been changed to protect their privacy. For some bad ones, I've changed the names when I am no longer as angry with them as I once was, or if I do not wish to embarrass them or those close to them or descended from them. Or, if I think that some fool might try to sue me, maim me, or even kill me!

I'm a writer, not a Warrior, for all my dabbling in the Arts. 

Sometimes, the names of Evil remain unchanged, as I have no fear to speak ill of the dead, especially if they are well buried. Or of some living, who hide in the shadows still and are dead to me. The dead cannot sue, they can but haunt me in my dreams, and the worst of them do that already. May I haunt them back. 


Wednesday, December 16, 2020

A Pandemic Christmas Table

How can the world put its arms all around me? I feel lost in the city.

-                 –   Yes, Heart of the Sunrise

Verily I say unto you, inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

-                   –   Matthew 25:45 (KJV)

 

The old neighbor cleared his throat, and began, in his English patched with Portuguese and sometimes French words, to tell her a story from behind the mask covering his face. Maryam, also masked, sat respectfully, a few meters away in his garden, listening. It was early December, the time when the churches, closed now to protect the public health, told the stories of that birth long ago and all that followed. The old man spoke of the flight of Joseph and Mary to Egypt, to escape the murderous intentions of a mad king.

She could relate to that story. It had been quiet in their village until that night. Then the knocking, more persistent, the crash of a broken door, raised voices, and shots. Her father and brothers still, a red stain spreading beneath them in the quiet restored.

 

They left that night. Boats and borders a blur, fear and hunger gnawing at her gut as they crossed dark waters into the unknown. At last, though, some normalcy, a place of refuge and humble, much needed work for her mother, gratefully cleaning the houses of their merciful hosts. Until the sickness.

The people were afraid. Soon, her mother was at home, without work, as people feared carried contagion among them. School, too, was different now: no games at recess in the yard, no whispered secrets with friends behind the gymnasium. Before the pandemic, she had begged for more screen time. Now, all she wanted was the open sky and grass beneath her feet.

Her mother, pleading, on the phone in her broken Portuguese, begging help, so little left until the end of the month, a Christmas perhaps without even pão on the table. No bread? Was it really that bad?

She remembered the old man telling other stories, of a life in poverty, daily wages of a loaf of bread or half a sausage. So it’s come to that now, thought Maryam, except there are no wages now, just the kindness of strangers with little to share themselves, and some small relief from their host government.

She remembered hearing how he got his first shoes at the age of 12, and how in some hard times before that they had survived in his fatherless house, by eating acorns stolen from the fields. Stolen by children, because the lords of the herdades would shoot trespassing adults. A beating was a small price to pay for survival.

Acorns?! What about them? she thought. Ah, but the big trees were far out in the countryside, too far for her without transportation. But… hadn’t she seen something like that in the bushes behind the school?

That night, when she asked her mother for another portion of noodles, there was quiet, and in a small, choked voice: there are no more. So it was.

Early the next morning, she woke first, dressed quickly and then walked the half kilometer to the slope behind the shuttered school. It would be another two hours before her class was to meet online in the dreaded Zoom chatroom.

There they were: small points of brown in the bushes. These looked nothing like the great cork oaks which had fed the old man as a hungry young boy. But the leaves, a bit like others she had seen on some big trees, but different. She gathered pockets full quickly, scratching her hands and arms on the prickly leaves, then hurried back home. She was wondering what the acorns would be like, surely substantial and delicious to have saved so many hungry children long ago. The anticipation was too much: she had to know. Stopping, she scanned the ground and found some rocks, took one in her hand and placed an acorn on another and smashed. The creamy whitish meat of the acorn was revealed in a mess of broken shell; she picked out a fat bit, stuck it in her mouth and chewed. Mmmmm. Not bad, kind of nutty, like hazelnuts maybe or cashews, but different.

Then the bitterness came, turning that initial pleasant taste to an astringent awfulness quickly spat onto the ground. Bah!

As she approached her home, she saw the old man in his garden, burning some trash and old sticks. She approached him and said, bom dia.

Bom dia, Maryam, como estas? he replied.

Not so good, she said, my mouth feels nasty. I don’t see how you could live on acorns!

You ate some? he asked.

Just one. That was enough. It’s so awful and bitter!

The old man began to laugh. You didn’t cook it, I assume. You have to do that for some of them. It depends on the kind you have.

She reached into her pocket, grabbed a few and held them out to the man. These! Yuck!

Again, a chuckle. Quercus coccifera, Kermes oak, he said. He had been a teacher and knew a lot of strange words. You’re right, they are bitter. But better if you cook them, or soak them for a while in water to take out the tannins.

What are tannins?

The things that make the acorns bitter. Other fruits have them too. Like persimmons.

Well how do I get rid of them?

There are a couple of ways, the old man said slowly, looking around the garden. He spied an old can, walked over and picked it up, then returned to Maryam and held out his hand. She gave him the acorns, which he dropped into the can and placed it onto the coals of the fire in the garden.

Heat can destroy the tannins, he said. But sometimes that’s not enough. Sometimes you have to soak them in water after you roast them.

For how long, she asked.

It depends. Maybe just an hour. Maybe a day. Maybe a week or longer. Every tree is a little different from others like it, and the environment of the tree can affect the taste and the bitterness a lot.

Her eyes strayed to the can on the coals. She could see that some of the acorn shells had split, revealing the insides, without the need to smash them. Wow, that’s easy, she thought.

Can I try them now? she asked.

Well, said the man, taking the hot can carefully at the upper rim and dumping its contents on the wet garden grass, give them a minute to cool, then go ahead.

The long minute passed, and she reached out, took a split acorn in her fingers and pulled at the edges of the split a little. A golden nut dropped out, giving off an interesting, caramely odor. Smells good, she thought. Popped it in her mouth and chewed. The same interesting taste she had at first before was there, but richer, and it was a bit like the filling of a special chocolate bar her mother bought for her at times. She chewed, swallowed, took another, then another and ate them all. Then she realized: no bitterness.

She reached into her pocket, grabbed another handful, threw it in the can, which she put back on the coals. Just wait.

The old man told her many different things that could be made from acorns: bread, paterniscas, meatballs without meat, more. But people have forgotten these things, he said quietly. They say acorns are food for pigs. Do I look like a pig?

She laughed, bade him adieu, and as she walked through the door of her house to share the breakfast bounty with her mother, visions of… so many delicious things danced in her head, visions of that Christmas table, full of unexpected blessings.



Maryam is ready now to bake the bread. Will you join her?  --->






The names of good people have been changed to protect their privacy. For some bad ones, I've changed the names when I am no longer as angry with them as I once was, or if I do not wish to embarrass them or those close to them or descended from them. Or, if I think that some fool might try to sue me, maim me, or even kill me!

I'm a writer, not a Warrior, for all my dabbling in the Arts. 

Sometimes, the names of Evil remain unchanged, as I have no fear to speak ill of the dead, especially if they are well buried. Or of some living, who hide in the shadows still and are dead to me. The dead cannot sue, they can but haunt me in my dreams, and the worst of them do that already. May I haunt them back. 


Tuesday, December 8, 2020

Acorn preparation the easy way

fireplace-roasted acorns

In a recent Facebook post asking about tips for achieving more self-sufficiency, I responded that my recent return to an interest in acorns had led to discoveries which theoretically make us 100% self-sufficient for food if we care to be. Then I was asked 

to which I responded:

"Our acorns are quite low in tannins as I mentioned, so depending on what you're working with changes may be needed. I am having trouble sourcing bitter acorns here, so there it's more theory than verified practice.

"Completely forget all those stupid hot water (boiling methods). Forget the streams and toilet tank BS for the cold extraction methods.

"1. Shell acorns. The fastest method for this is roasting, but if you want to avoid that 

"(a1) dry for a while or in a desiccator and

"(b1) Cut lengthwise (wear butcher's gloves and use a narrow, long knife, employing the tip end as a fulcrum) and pry out the nut - a grapefruit spoon is the best aid I've found for difficult cases, and its serrations can be useful for scraping off bad bits

"OR, for roasting

"(a2) cut a lengthwise slit in the acorns, drop into water to soak for some hours (I sometimes use a modified olive slitting tube with two cutting vanes removed) and

"(b2) roast in a cast-iron pan over a campfire or in a fireplace for that nice smoked tang or roast for maybe 15-30 minutes in the oven at 230 degrees C or so; the roast is done when the slits open wide, some so much so that the nuts just fall out. Don't worry if the acorns become very dark, even black - they are carmelized, not burned usually - yum!

"2. Then taste the acorns, and if bitter, drop into water in a 1 gallon plastic water bottle or other container; soak and change water every half day or day, tasting each time until you feel that the debittering is completed to your satisfaction.

"3. Take the nuts, dry them briefly and grind them in blender, using a sieve/screen to sift the fine flour from the grits, the latter being a good form to roast as an ersatz coffee. Use fresh/moist within a week or so, dry it for longer storage at ambient temperature or freeze it for use months or years later (depending on your freezer conditions)...."

For the roasting method, that 1a2 step is very important! Acorns with a lot of moisture inside can burst explosively if there is nothing - like a cut in the nut - to allow steam to escape. And the uncut ones that don't burst often have their texture and taste ruined by excessive steaming inside the intact shell. With a cut, the shells will split wider and dry, so that acorn meats often simply fall out intact.

The first time I tried to roast acorns without cutting the shells was quite dramatic. Gaia, our Fila de São Miguel (like a Portuguese pit bull) is a terrifying dog who longs to hear the words Mate todos! ("kill them all") when I let her outside, but she was the terrified one with the shells bursting loudly inside our flimsy toaster oven. The trembling beast had to be sent outside to go hide in a kennel, and she did not ask to come back in that night. Harmat, my Wire-haired Viszla from a great breeder in hunting Hungary, just wanted to know where she could retrieve the shot birds.

In the meantime, I can get a couple kilograms of flour from acorns swept off the ground and processed fresh in about an hour, to make roasted nuts, crackers, dark breads of every kind, rich nut cheeses, meatless balls, delicious ersatz coffees and tea and more. A journalist friend recently blogged about John Lennon, who has been dead now about as long as he walked the earth, and I responded:
"... woke at 5 am, put on my robe and gathered acorns from the terrace as it rained, and as I washed and slit the fresh nuts to prepare for roasting in the fireplace, to open them up, make them easy to shell and convert to acorn flour, the main part of our breads and other dishes for a few weeks now, I found myself singing "Imagine" quietly as I pictured industrialized monoculture fields of wheat gone from our landscapes, replaced by groves of oaks in guild permacultures, once again giving renewable wood for fuel, crafts and construction, cork bark to keep us warm in insulated walls and to hold our fruit harvest wines in their flasks, and producing their regular crops of acorn grains above, squashes and hops (for acorn beer) climbing those trees and the understories of lesser trees, fruit bushes, herbs and fiber plants spread below and between them, asparagus close in and peeking through shrub twigs, truffles below the earth, and the sounds of a thousand birds at every level of branches and across the ground. Imagine that. It's easy if you try."



Sunday, January 15, 2017

Time Machine

I dropped Susan and Will at the Lisbon airport, then headed to Benfica to find the apartment before dinner to discuss translation courses at Universidade Nova next summer. After an hour of circling and waiting, I swooped down on a parking spot right in front of the building. The old elevator was a bit of a puzzle, but I finally figured out to close the gate and rose and rose to the seventh floor, out, right and fumbled the huge key in the lock, opened to the dark, groped for and found the master switch on the electrical panel, lights on, and entered the time machine.

The pipe on the shelf, likely lit last some decades before, had a fresh warm scent of tobacco. The furniture, neat and new in appearance, reminded me a little of my last visit to a safe house in the GDR. I felt her presence, saw the books and thought of the soft, strong hands that had held them and turned the pages. Through the hall, around the corner, around another and left, the little room, small bed and there I found her, that young doctor that I love, holding her infant son, the boy's face familiar with that knowing look.

Black and white the image, another near, color, the boy a little older, me thinking of his birthday the summer past, forty, little changed.

Books and books, closets, all clean, another room, a bed, neat and waiting to receive me after a long evening of plans and friendly talk of best practice and the students and the challenges of so much to teach, to learn, and so little time.

I didn't want to stay but tired, with a drive of hours home, so up I went again into that time machine and she was there, the air welcoming and warm, the bed and blankets covering the dreams and I heard her, pen scratching at the desk, studying for some qualification. And in the night her arm slipped softly around me in my sleep, my fingers brushed hers like the strings of a healing harp and I breathed deep in a reality familiar and distant in my dream.

Woke, felt her just departed, so I rose, dressed, ate a bit of chocolate, found the master switch of the time machine again and rode down and down, out and to the car in the dark through the streets, the bridge, tolls and long miles, hurtling through the dark in the Renault Tardis to home, where all those good dogs greeted as I passed by into the house where I felt her near, slipped quietly beside the sleeping form in the bed where her arm slipped softly around me, the tight curls of her hair in my nose as I breathed the air of content and drifted back in that time with the young doctor that I love.

Sunday, December 18, 2016

Tosta de tomate

One of the conveniences of living in a Portuguese border town is that what we can't find here is probably to be had with a ten-minute drive across the border to Badajoz, Spain.

One of those things is apparently tomato toast. One morning the doutora announced that we were going for a drive and would have breakfast in Spain. I was quietly horrified at the idea, because Portuguese friends have often told me how terrible Spanish food is, and my few experiences up to that point had done little to contradict their opinions.

And when we took the freeway exit to what I would probably call a truck stop, I was dubiously curious about what was to come. Just tosta, she said as we approached the cafeteria counter, and café.

Hmm. I thought as I watched the help slop olive oil over a bit of white bread toast. Very dubious. We were given a plastic squeeze bottle with some orange crap in it, which turned out to be pureed tomato. At the table, I was instructed to spread the goop onto the olive oil-soaked toast and then add just a sprinle of salt. Given that we almost never cook with salt, I was really skeptical now.

It was love at first bite. My God.


Since then we've improved on that first delicious experience; now the tomatoes come fresh from the garden sometimes, and the bread for toasting is usually some sort of a spelt-and-rye sourdough or some other whole grain mix. And we use a better salt, collected from evaporation beds by the seaside. The olive oil too is a few classes better - Portugal has the best in the world, after all. Heaven can get better.

But that's usually the Portuguese way: go out and find something great somewhere in the world, maybe just a little way across the border. And make it better.


Saturday, December 17, 2016

Salazar

António de Oliveira Salazar,
100th prime minister of Portugal
I'm a little hard of hearing, so when the doutora asked me if I wanted a "Salazar" when transferring my evening meal from a small pot to the soup plate, I thought I heard her wrong. A what? I asked. Do you want a Salazar? she repeated.

The beautiful thing about languages is that they are not about words, but about culture, context and communication. And here I was definitely lost in the translation of her Porglish.

We went through this repetition a few more times until she finally reached over to the bamboo utensil holder and pulled out a spatula. A spatula? I asked. What the hell did you just call it?

Salazar, she responded patiently.



You've got to be kidding. Isn't there some other word for it?

Não.

Really? None at all? She muttered some other Portuguese expression.

So is that what you would say if you were talking to a Brazilian?

No, she responded, I would say it is a Salazar and explain it to them.

So she patiently explained to this dumb American that because the dictator Salazar had taken all the money for the state and kept the people poor, essentially cleaned out the the consumer economy like a spatula cleans a soup bowl, the kitchen tool now bears his name in remembrance.